And You Thought Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII Was Pandering

By Spencer . July 12, 2013 . 2:53am

Lightning is supposed to be a goddess, but she also dresses in cat suit and has salacious victory poses in Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII. All of these elements are unnecessary for Lightning to act as the world’s savior and are in stark contrast to her cool demeanor. Square Enix is pandering to a degree, but it’s not that bad compared to Kaku-San-Sei Million Arthur.


The PlayStation Vita version just got an update with swimsuits and jiggling…


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  • Isaac Newton

    Me Gusta..

  • Nanaki

    Pfft…Hahahaha xD

  • Chrystofax

    Yeah I saw that afew days ago, I guess they know what audience they’re going for..

  • Punny Fuzz

    That song is pretty catchy tho.

  • Why are there auto-wiggling tumors on those girls’ torsos? Quick, somebody take them to an ER before it’s too late!

    • JustThisOne

      It’s too late for them. They’ve got chestbursters.

      *puts hands on table*

      The aliens have arrived.

    • Juan Andrés Valencia
      • The joke is lost on me, I’m afraid… Never was one for The Simpsons or similar shows (i.e: never got around to even watching them).

        • Testsubject909

          The guy is an unlicensed and incompetent doctor yet somehow he always ends up finding some work.

          He’s also the one responsible for this little song:
          “The knee bone’s connected to the something,
          The something is connected to the red thing,
          The red thing is connected to my wrist watch —
          Uh oh.”
          — Dr. Nick reminds himself how to do medicine,
          “Homer’s Triple Bypass”

          Unfortunately, any video of this has probably been removed for Copyrights infringement.

    • Hinataharem

      Please don’t refer to breasts as tumors, no matter the size.

      • My comment wasn’t about size at all though; it’s about how the breasts just seem to wiggle about randomly without any external force (unless there was some gyroscope or touchscreen input involved in making this promo video). It’s even more uncanny when the rest of the body in those card illustrations isn’t moving.

        • Hinataharem

          More than likely, they were jiggling because someone was touching the touchscreen, which can’t be shown on video, so they looked like they were moving on their own.

          My point is, tumors and breasts are an unfortunate thing to lump together (pun not intended). Cuz ya know, cancer.

          • Yes, I caught on with your previous comment; I wasn’t aiming for morbid humor, but point taken. (On the other hand, cancer can strike a lot of other parts/areas in the body, so the ‘unfortunate implication’ angle is almost impossible to dodge.)

  • Cruxis


  • Go2hell66

    shots fired at LR FFXIII

    • KnifeAndFork

      Well deserved

  • DrakeClawfang

    protip – they are

  • Forty

    What’s wrong with pandering?
    And what does this game have to do with Lightning Returns?

    I don’t get it.

  • Brandonmkii

    They can pander all they want, as long as they’re pandering to me.

  • passthegrenadeplease

    Well, look what we have here! Looks pretty interesting…
    *watches video*
    I’ll be in my bunk.

  • ragingmerifes

    Damn, I thought it was a new Growlanser…

    • TrevHead

      Yeah that art does look like Urushihara of Growlancer & Langrisser doesn’t it

  • Crazy_O

    I’m not that into card games, but I could see myself testing this… for s.. nah, you know exactly why :3

  • Spider-Man

    “The PlayStation Vita version just got an update with swimsuits and jiggling…”

    Welp, let’s give this an import.

    • Noire

      Well, you can download it for free from Japan Lastation Network.

      • Spider-Man

        Well then, thanks for the tip. I’ll get right on it.

      • ishyg

        Thanks for the tip. Time to make my brother’s Vita useful again.

  • Pinkemon

    Uh-oh, looks like those boobs are trying to make an escape.

    • JustThisOne

      It seriously does look like that!

      It’s because nothing else is animated, so it looks.. weird.

    • Raze

      The bewbs are actually slime in disguise…

  • Warboss Aohd

    By Mork’s Choppa…….what happened ta tryin’ ta sell a game usin’ gameplay an’ marketing?

    • DyLaN

      Excuse me, but can you please use proper english? Its kinda annoying and hard to read.

      EDIT: Lol why the downvotes? Fight with words instead of downvoting ppl… Geez.

      • Anime10121

        I’ll explain why people downvoted you since no one else has. Warboss has been playing the role of an Ork since his accounts creation, and while sometimes it takes a little deciphering to get what he’s actually trying to say (9 times outta 10 though, its really easy), he generally makes some really good points/arguments. I find myself agreeing with him much more than disagreeing, and he seems like a pretty reasonable fellow.

        tldr, Ork’s dont need to speak proper English, since they’re not English speakers ;P

        • DyLaN

          I dunno abt you guys, but its a bit hard on my brain to decipher his language. (Though I admit its not quite Paca Plus engrish yet. But it still come close to it at times)

          But whtever i am not in the “in” crowds so ppl will dislike my opinion either way.

          • Anime10121

            Hey Dylan, dont say that, you’re cool enough to me bro :)

            Sometimes it is rather hard to decipher, I also thought the same thing the first time I read one of his comments, but the more I read, the more I realized he’s just trying to play a part, and still adds to discussion.

            Oh and just to offset the downvotes, I’ll upvote your first comment!

          • DyLaN

            Thk a lot, A10121.

  • NRool

    How sad, how very very sad.

  • Bur

    It’s kind of hypnotic…

  • Randy Marsh

    I could have sworn I just watched a trailer for a Compile Heart game….

    • Noire

      Wha… Wha… What are you talking about!

      • Joshua Myers

        Awesome avatar one of my favorite games

  • William Hsia

    man, this would be bad, except, we would expect this from a game like this.

  • psycho_bandaid

    I think Squeenix knows the Vita audience. Anyway nothing wrong with a little pandering. I dread the day when we have to be totally politically correct even when playing videogames.

  • Monterossa

    When Square Enix learned how to do fanservice, the planet earth will be much better place to live.

    • Testsubject909

      Fanservice exists in many different ways and form, it’s not just sexual.

      • Monterossa

        yeah, including those SOLDIER, Yuna, and Miqo’te outfits.

  • SunOatBoatMatadorQuattro

    What the heck? The article’s title confused me. Still, I’m staying after watching that educational video.

  • Zohard

    what have you done ?

  • BenderIsGreat

    There is nothing, NOTHING wrong with this kind of pandering.


    • Testsubject909

      As a pervert I can enjoy it. In terms of it’s visual appeal I say it’s flawed, it would’ve been more interesting if the whole image was just slightly animated in a loop, it would’ve made for something more interesting. See Vanillaware’s work with 2D portraits like Grim Grimoire, far more interesting and something they could’ve done with the trading card game here.

      And then there’s the social issues that I’m not gonna bother.

    • Bigabu Beaze

      You tell em Bender!

  • Niyari

    holy shit that video is hilarious. way to go Japan. also, ChouCho?

  • Kai2591

    Super rare!
    Super rare+!

    srzly tho those jiggling is unnecessary and embarrassing -_-“

    • Testsubject909

      Necessary AND embarrassing?

      I think you meant unnecessary.

      • Kai2591

        lol you got me there. t’was a typo ;)

  • gerald

    There’s a major double standard for sexism in games right now.

    Exaggerated female body and femininity = sexism/pandering
    Exaggerated male body and masculinity = cool beans

    Seems to me the ones being sexist are the ones who think women can’t handle the way they’re portayed in some games while men can handle their stereotypes just fine.

    • new_tradition

      Wellllll…I think there’s a bit of a double standard about the type of men being pandered. I can’t speak for all gamers interested, but I’m certain I’m not the only one who prefers the pretty boy over muscular he-men. I’ve noticed when male gamers do actually lament over male character designs, its more often than not the pretty boys. Apparently muscular guys running around in a loincloth is better than a slim guy wearing leather or something, lol

      • Letiumtide

        My boyfriend feels the exact same way and it bothers him a lot that those men are almost non-existant in video games nowadays.

        • DyLaN

          He needs to play more JRPGs XD

          • Letiumtide

            Haha, he played enough JRPGS, I think it’s more about what’s available and in what capacity and roles. Also, just, to not have it limited to one genre. I can’t speak for him entirely, but I know he’s right, men, the same as women, have been getting worse in video games. (not all the time always, but more than enough.)

      • Testsubject909

        The latter is because of a general mindset and standard placed down upon our gender through society and the values of the previous generation which do reinforce certain male stereotypes from within our own kin and gender, plus with the whole “Guys should be tough” we’re also being removed the option of complaining about it or else face the jeering attitude of our own kind and of the opposite gender in some or many cases pending where you live.

        Any and every stereotype hampers either gender in many many ways. And a large variety of the stereotypes that are enforced on the male gender also makes it so that we’re being removed the ability to express any complaint about it without fear of an attack on our own masculinity which in itself is also partially a stereotype that’s been handed down through the generations.

        We’re screwed in our own ways in many ways, but we’ve been raised to “Deal with it” through continuous social reinforcement… Whether we like it or not. And by the time we realize it. It’s a bit late, we’re already trained.

        Edit: By the latter, I meant the “Huge muscular guy”.

      • ForteWily

        I think that their is an upper limit to both, but then again… I am a down-to-earth fellow that feels that you don’t need to exaggerated a body archetype too much to get something striking to the eye.

        Unless that is the entire point of the design to be completely outlandish, there is no need for it. That is how I feel anyway.

    • Regardless of who or how many people can handle them or not, saturation/overuse of stereotypes (or, on a fictional level, archetypes) isn’t healthy for the market in the long run, the most immediate problem being the lack of variety. For that matter, I personally think we’re starting to feel (or at least see) the effects already.

      “Seems to me the ones being sexist are the ones who think women can’t handle the way they’re portayed in some games while men can handle their stereotypes just fine.”

      Consideration that a group of people might be iffed by the way certain aspects of their category are portrayed isn’t the same as ignorant/discriminating marginalization. Perhaps there could be more criticism about male stereotypes, but I wouldn’t consider either as inherently ill-willed.

    • supervamp

      Honestly i think most people don’t understand what the word sexist means unless the character is portrayed in a way that is supposed to suggest that women are inferior to men, not just dressing up or posing in sexy ways then i don’t see how that even remotely fits the definition of sexism the same for male characters.

    • puchinri

      Well, what you refer to is a massive over-simplification of what most people call out. In general, exaggeration isn’t the problem anyway, it’s how it’s utilized (and someone with enough smarts on the topic knows that when it gets bad enough, it’s problematic regardless of the characters gender).

      The main problem is, female characters get exaggerated to be appealing sexually (or romantically, etc) while male characters get exaggerated to play as power fantasies. Neither is healthy, but one is a bit more damaging than the other given our current society. Neither is good, but one takes a lot more agency from the characters just to make them someone else’s wet dream (and that same pandering also reflects badly on how people think they need to advertise to men).

  • Needs more flat-chests!

    • Bigabu Beaze

      No it doesnt.

      • CirnoLakes

        Everything in this world needs more flat chests.

    • CirnoLakes

      I wonder how Siliconera feel about putting such loli ecchi in one of their articles.

      That thumbnail is misleading. You see that and it’s a blatant loli picture. But then you click the video and it’s full of boobs and almost no DFC whatsoever. False advertising.

      Well, not that this is a good looking game. But everything in this world benefits from flat chests.

  • Ni

    hmm…so a sword girls like game by compile heart. i might check this out
    *see SE logo*

  • Ni

    what if…SE make a Lightning card in this version of the game? :D

    • Testsubject909

      She’ll have the godd..ess…liest… Yes, Goddessliest boob jiggle of them all.

  • This was hilariously awesome lol. I like how when they scrolled over to the girl holding the bear absolutely nothing happened XD. I could go for a card game with this kind of pandering =P. Hopefully it gets localized lol

  • Raltrios

    That looks so unnatural. The swaying of boobs warps the space around it? Must have some serious gravitational effects…

    • The boobs have their own gravitational orbit and distorts the space-time continuum around them.

  • That was hella more funny than arousing.

  • HPN

    Pandering? Please. Square is selling content players want. Your thin excuse for an article is merely trolling with said content.

    • DyLaN

      On the other hand, I think LR:FF13 costumes option isn’t pandering just like every other JRPG with different costumes.

    • CirnoLakes

      While I’m glad that Square Enix isn’t shying away from creating anime content.

      This is the content that players want? I don’t think so. This looks like it could just be another bad iOS game. Do you know how the card game works? Can you be sure of its quality?

      All that video does is to show that the game has jiggle physics, in a card game. That’s not very impressive and I don’t think that’s what fans want.

  • Aristides

    I can imagine all the curtains in a localization XD

  • KnifeAndFork

    the boobs bounce but the women stay absolutely frozen stiff

    • ShadowDivz

      Sounds like the broad i brought home last night.
      Women, am i right fellas?
      Heyoo! xD

      • Testsubject909

        I’m tempted to make a joke about you being a sexist pig with a monocle. Mainly because of your avatar.

        Edit: Yes, your avatar doesn’t have a monocle. He really should.

    • DyLaN

      Gainaxing at its finest :P

  • ShadowDivz

    “Lightning is supposed to be a goddess, but she also dresses in cat suit and has salacious victory poses”
    “All of these elements are unnecessary for Lightning to act as the world’s savior”

    Or better yet, TSUNDERE CAT CHICKS! because Lightning is totally tsundere.

    • Testsubject909

      Well. Lightning being pandering will certainly get a lot of fans to go “She’s a goddess *swoon*” and stuff… replace swoon by any other relevant action.

      • That word wouldn’t start with an “f” and ends with “p” would it? Cause I’m sure there’s been plenty of doujin of her and her sister for a lot of fans to do that too while calling her a goddess.

  • Logan Moll

    Wow, this is a SE game? I was expecting NISA. Wtf?

  • I’m pretty sure fan-service is the least of the Final Fantasy XIII games’ problems. People complained about it in XIII-2 and now in Lightning Returns. Bikinis and pantyshots aren’t offensive, it’s the terrible games themselves.

  • Gilgamesh2025

    Mmmm … boobs! ♪

  • CirnoLakes

    Oh dang. Square Enix tryin’ to get dat otaku dollar.

    • Demeanor

      It’d be fun to see the board meetings that give birth to these things XD at least my glorious Senran has great characters and VAs, an anime, great gameplay and attention to details, and an enjoyable story! This on the other hand doesn’t strike me as “noble” AT ALL XD

  • Demeanor

    Uhm… what did I just see exactly??? Is this… Square Enix? You know, the guys who created Xenogears and Brave Fencer Musashi, and Parasite Eve and… ehm you know the rest. O_O they looked like they had little motors inside those…

    • Testsubject909

      *reads* Parasite Eve… 3rd Birthday.

      • 3rd Birthday IS Parasite Eve, last I remember. But they did more! SaGa, Legend of Mana, Varkyrie Profile, Star Ocean, Front Mission, among other obscure titles. I think they also have Space Invaders and the Taito titles now, too.

        • Solomon_Kano

          I think that was the point of what he’s saying. Parasite Eve, in form of The 3rd Birthday, wasn’t without its share of pandering.

        • Sylveria

          I don’t believe Square Enix made any of those games you’ve mentioned except 3rd Birthday. Squaresoft did.

          Square Enix made this, FFX-2, 3rd Birthday, and Kingdom Hearts and FF13 which has inspired so much shota porn it would make your head pop.

          • You wish it was all shota! But that’s *ahem* besides the point. >_>

            And what makes you think that Square Enix is very different from Square Soft? Toriyama was just as involved in the PSOne titles as he was in FF13, for example. It is very dumb to discriminate by brand when it is basically most of the same people responsible for past successes (and failures).

  • Anime10121

    These jiggling tits are SUPER RARE!

    Oh but these, THESE jiggling tits are SUPER RARE +!!!


    • Testsubject909

      Hmm… something about the artwork is lacking… Okay, many little details are lacking.

      Edit: Especially when you compare this one to the other drawings.

      • Anime10121

        Not the ones that matter!
        Hurr hurr hurr ;)

  • xXDGFXx

    Did they really add jiggle “physics” to a 2D card game?

  • Testsubject909

    Okay. I’m glad I wasn’t drinking my coffee because I bursted out into laughter.

    The jiggles here are even more random then those in Dead or Alive Xtreme 2.

  • mirumu

    I’m not sure this is really worse pandering. This is just some free-to-play joke of a game. Wasn’t Lightning Returns meant to be a serious Final Fantasy title?

  • Solomon_Kano

    They aren’t even jiggling, they’re practically dancing. I can’t even.

    • You can’t even? I don’t want to.

  • 果林

    wait so is this a card game..?

    • SunOatBoatMatadorQuattro

      This was a game? My mind got lost after watching the video.

  • I’m just here for boobies, that is all.

  • Sylveria

    People keep saying Lightning is “cool”. I don’t think this word means what you think it means. Having wild-mood swings from genocidal psycho to emotionless brick are not what I’d define as cool. Not to mention the universe being in her hands is far from comforting as the Farron family seems to have a pretty long failure streak going when it comes to saving stuff.

  • HavocAccelerator

    Thanks for the article, Kotaku.

  • Himiko

    And there’s nothing wrong with it.

  • Musashi234

    This has to be the Funniest thing ive ever Seen lmfao!!!

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